For higher or worse, social media is now a fixture in our lives. It influences how we socialize, work, and join with our communities. It’s almost not possible to stay with out, and I’m usually tremendous envious of people that don’t use it in any respect. In 2023, there have been an estimated 4.9 billion social media customers worldwide, with the common particular person spending 145 minutes on social media every single day. I don’t find out about you, however I can consider much better issues to do than spend 2+ hours on my cellphone every day.
It’s wild to assume that social media didn’t exist within the kind it did now once I began my profession as an Leisure Publicist in 2005. On the time, we had MySpace, however it wasn’t near how we now use social platforms. One 12 months later, Twitter (now X) would attain the cultural zeitgeist, and we’d start to grasp how rapidly the world was linked.
Featured picture from our interview with Sanetra Nere Longno.
As a result of I’ve chosen a profession that depends closely on social media and staying up to the mark on developments, I’m continually re-evaluating and readjusting my conduct and limits with numerous platforms. It’s taken a number of iterations, plus numerous reflection on my time and utilization, however I landed in a great place as soon as I began asking myself a number of key questions and shifting my conduct in game-changing methods.
Now, these are the social media “guidelines” and limits I follow to make sure my relationship with my platforms stays wholesome—a supply of connection and inspiration.
Associates Get Information Earlier than Strangers
This one is straightforward, however no enormous life occasion or change will hit social media earlier than my inside circle, pricey mates, or household will get the information. I’ve largely determined to maintain that form of information off of social media anyway in order that a big chunk of my private life stays non-public. Nonetheless, if I’m going to share any kind of replace, I take a beat earlier than posting.“Do my greatest girlfriends find out about this?” If the reply is not any, it doesn’t get shared.
Am I prepared to interact with what I’m sharing?
I LOVE to share a very good deal. Whether or not it’s a candle dupe, a steal on a fantastic costume, or a product I actually really love—it’s all honest sport. However, these types of posts usually garner loads of questions and responses. So I ask myself earlier than posting: Am I prepared to interact? If the reply is not any, I don’t submit something. I like being useful and wish to really feel that my group can depend on me, but when I’m drained or depleted and received’t take time to reply, I merely don’t submit about it.
Holidays are for Staying Current
Camille did an unbelievable job of this when she traveled for her fortieth birthday. She was very intentional upfront about disconnecting, even sharing in her e-newsletter that she was deleting the Instagram app whereas away. What a present to present your self.
Right here’s how I see it. If I’m spending 1000’s of {dollars} on touring, particularly someplace new, solely to be on my cellphone the complete time… properly, I may’ve finished that at residence. This has been an enormous follow for me, however I want to take all the images I can on my journey, keep current within the second, then if I really feel like sharing once I return, I’ll. After all there have been serendipitous moments the place I’ve posted from one other nation, solely to study a buddy was additionally there so we may meet up. It’s so enjoyable, but when I’m open to that subsequent time, I’ll submit forward of time that I’m going to a particular location within the hopes a buddy can also be there. TL; DR: I’m posting about my journeys after ought to I even determine to do this.
Word: you would change the phrase “trip” for dinners, buddy hangs, time with household, and so on. The most important query I think about is: am I current and being within the second proper now? As a result of it’s second I’ll by no means get again.
Why am I sharing this?
This can be a query I ask myself usually. We overanalyze the reply, certain, however I additionally assume it’s a legitimate query to mirror on. One factor I seen about leaders I like in knowledgeable capability is that they not often use social media to share. They’re passive customers in that they pop on to see what is occurring on the earth, however they not often submit themselves.
These are the questions that information what I find yourself posting:
- Do I wish to doc a second in time?
- Am I amplifying another person’s voice or work?
- Is what I’m sharing useful?
- Will this join or create group?
These are the issues I are likely to wish to submit and share most about. And if the intention behind my posting doesn’t verify a kind of containers? I’ll fortunately simply maintain it to myself.
Are you partaking with individuals or pages that make you cheerful?
If the reply is not any, your choices are easy: mute or unfollow. There have been pages or individuals I adopted due to a particular time or interval in my life. Working example: I’m nonetheless on my no-drinking life-style, so following pages of alcohol, or seeing individuals submit about themselves doing one thing cringe whereas drunk isn’t serving me at this second in life. So, I select to mute or unfollow. It’s in all probability the only boundary we will set for ourselves.
Make the most of Your Settings: Quiet Mode, Time Restrict, Flip Off Notifications
My life modified for the higher once I turned off my Instagram notifications. I had such a behavior of rapidly responding the second somebody reached out or commented on a narrative or submit. Consequently, I felt like a prisoner to my feed and began to resent even being energetic on the platform. I’ve additionally set a time restrict, giving myself half-hour per day and make the most of Quiet Mode within the evenings so anybody that messages me is aware of I received’t be responding. To me, this has been the most effective type of self-care.
What else may I be doing with my time?
I listened to this episode of Mel Robbin’s podcast just lately the place she had Dr. Kanojia (Dr. Okay) as a visitor. He’s a Harvard-trained psychiatrist specializing in trendy psychological well being and know-how’s influence on the mind. It’s a must-listen for everybody.
What actually hit me was after they talked about why we really feel drained the entire time. There are lots of elements at play, however within the context of social media, we will attribute hours of scrolling and bingeing content material for killing our consideration span. Since I’ve listened to the podcast, anytime I’ve gone to seize my cellphone to doom scroll, I’ve requested myself what else I could possibly be doing? What could be extra productive? I’ll give myself a couple of minutes (really, a couple of minutes tops) to scroll, then I get to the duty at hand. Consequently, my productiveness has skyrocketed.
The Takeaway
Readers, I’m seeing a direct correlation between not ingesting and slicing again on social media utilization. When requested if I miss alcohol, I mirror on how I miss having a margarita on a sizzling summer season day or a Spritz on a patio. However one margarita or Spritz wasn’t an issue, it was the a number of I’d have and the way I’d really feel the subsequent day.
The identical has been true of my social media utilization. Spending 5-10 minutes on social media every day wasn’t the issue. As an alternative, it was the hours of scrolling, to not point out the way in which it made me really feel. I’d usually finish these scrolling periods feeling that I used to be lacking out on one thing or negatively evaluating myself to others. That instances takes me out of the current second and I fell sufferer to the eye economic system. And once I take into consideration the one second I’ve proper now—the current second—I wish to be doing issues that make me really feel completely happy, peaceable, fulfilled, and relaxed.
I can’t do away with social media, however I can management the way it suits into my life. I hope these prompts and issues make it easier to as you study to navigate your social utilization and that they depart you feeling a bit of lighter. Belief me: with out the burden of others’ lives in your thoughts always, it is going to.